Doing what it takes to stay sane

Day 40

Since having a major crisis of confidence in GAPS, I've really relaxed my attempt to do GAPS Intro as close to the letter as possible. I found that I just had to let go in order to keep my sanity.

Yesterday we included a chopped tomato in a soup and introduced avocado. We also ate chicken livers for the first time. Three new things in one day - I would have considered that reckless a couple of weeks ago. The avocado was absolutely delicious - creamy and fresh tasting - mmmm. Aside from a reflux wakeup at 9:30 p.m., Ellie slept through the night til 5:30. This is remarkable because last time Ellie ate avocado she was up for hours in the night screaming with an ouchie tummy. Today she had a fairly bad face rash, so the jury's out on whether the additions were a very good idea. I don't really care, though. Honestly I feel like if something isn't causing an allergic reaction, we're going to keep it in the diet. I'm so tired of how restricted our diet has been.

Today I had another piece of fruit - a perfectly ripe apricot. I had two handfuls of cashews. Another first since being on GAPS. We tried juicing again - this time juicing cucumbers.

The pièce de résistance of my rebellious weekend was dinner out today. It was our first time eating out as a family in a long time. We went to a place known for being paleo diet friendly. I ordered a hamburger sans bun and Ellie got an elk burger! Without planning it, we had raw veggies for the first time - lettuce and tomato and pickle slices. Ellie was so excited about the veggies! So was I. We had so much fun being out. I think the months of working endlessly in the kitchen had really gotten to me and it was so nice to take a break.

Time will only tell whether taking all these risks was a good idea or not. I have a feeling we're in for a bad night. But it was worth it. Even if we have to take a step or two back tomorrow, it was great to feel "normal" - or closer to it - for a little while.